2024 - A Charge to the Privy

The pre-dawn shriek of a LBT (Little Brown Thing) in the tree outside my tent window confirmed the day of the 2024 Rhino Charge was about to begin. 

The sounds of the night before filled me as team leader with great concern. Grown men expunging food-borne poison throughout the night left me wondering what would be left of our carefully compiled Rhino Charge team. 

During the previous night's planning session, The Internationals' Team entry, Car 30, had mastered new technology, distilled decades of human experience of how to tackle the African bush, and come through with an exciting plan for a real adventure in the wilds of Kajiado County, Kenya.

In the darkness however these plans lay groaning in tented cots, a group of middle-aged men barely able to speak in the throes of an attack of vicious food poisoning.

Our navigator Andy was found shivering and unable to move. A WhatsApp from Terje's tent asking for assistance, his back put-out by multiple night-long loo visits.

As the driver, I Edward was suffering somewhat but more in lost shoe rubber by trudging to and fro from the Camp Privy.

Arriving at the torch-lit mess tent brought the news that Joss, one of our two most experienced runners, had been disgorging without a pause since midnight but was determined, that if he could stand, the show must go on. His tent-mate Jason "The Patron" lay unmoving in his bed. Our other key runner of 8 years Charging, Mike, had spent the past 36 hours groaning with stomach cramps but declared himself fit enough at least to get to the start. 

5:45am: Car 30 team was left desperately short of participants.

It seemed our 2024 Rhino Charge was over before it had even begun.

A sudden idea popped up. The camp crew preferred separate rations….and so were not suffering. Perhaps there was time to seek permission for a crew change even though we only had 20 mins to leave for the starting lineup. A WhatsApp was sent to Don White, the Clerk of the Course, to see if we could be helped to the start. 

We arrived at the line-up to find Sarah, the Response Med medic, waiting to get some final details. The car parked up to the side of the Copy Cat queue but we were told to expect a new start point if the medical clearance didn’t come through before lineup departure at 6:22am.

Just in time clearance for the new crew members was granted and we followed our original group in the line up to be driven out to our GuardPost.

After a bumpy circuitous drive, the final 5 mins wait to get into the Copy Cat starting circle was almost too much for stomachs to bear but, with a grimace and a waddle, merciful sanctuary was found behind the main mess tent, just in time. 

At 7:30am the start whistle blew and we were off. Plans for straight lines were out of the question as there wasn’t anyone on our team strong or experienced enough to manage any of the expected rough cutaways but, thanks to the layout of the Charge this year, there were multiple alternative options and we could take the river route to Gridless Guard Post.

Our replacement navigator Ian was still grasping which way round everything needed to be, so it was very helpful to find Jeremy Andrade, a red-shirted official, standing at the entrance to the Control that had been slightly hidden in the bush, or we might have just shot past. 

Joss, the midnight runner (pun intended) had weakened significantly. We needed to get him to the medics, and fast. Unsurprisingly his attitude was for us to do the Gauntlet first but bacterial delirium had clearly set in.

Further assistance came from David Lowe, the GuardPost control official, who advised us of the shortest route to the Medical Centre. Now was time for us to take to the Red Roads but natural Charging instinct still led us to look for straighter lines. The sight of Car 14 lodged up to its windows in a donga (wash-away rivulet) soon put us off the idea and we motored on sensibly, checking in at Aquamist Guard Post briefly and then into the medical camp. 

The field medical facility was already full of Car 30 teammates who had been driven from camp by Support Crew Jason No. 2, who had himself been struck down and placed on a drip during scrutineering on the day before, along with Mike and Frederik, our Chief Support Car driver.

The medical team had by now set aside a whole ward (#30) where drips were lodged into numerous sickly arms. Joss, our midnight runner, was shown to the last bed in the back of the tent and a drip and blanket swiftly applied.

Instead of recovering overnight as planned, it transpired that Frederik's blood oxygen levels were so low that it had been agreed he needed to be evacuated by an AMFREF Flying Doctors plane. A difficult night had now become much more serious.

I looked around and realised that we were now back down to x4 of us. Jason No. 2 was flip-flopping around with semi-sensible words of support and encouragement. An idea dawned.."Jason do you want to join us? We are just going to take the roads, chill and enjoy the day.” “Sure mate, let me get a pair of shoes on” was his enthusiastic reply. 

Further requests to the Clerk of the Course followed, more medical forms filled, insurance purchased and green lights given. Our newest combatant wasn’t really in top shape after his own sufferings of the past 48 hours so we offered him the navigator seat, took a quick sponsors' photo featuring the new team and set out into the great unknown. 

As we left the medical facility we had a decision to make….turn left to find the main road to the Gauntlet or turn right onto a straighter line through the bush? After a moment’s indecision, we chose to turn right and our Charging adventure began. 

The first guard post of the Gauntlet soon enough hoved into view. Decision time…turn right off the track and head off-road up a hill direct to the control…., or follow the road? RIGHT we went once again and within 10m... boom, the Charge Car tipped sideways into a hole. My heart sang with joy. Hooray, a Rhino Charge problem to solve meaning the winch was needed, if only to prevent the car rolling onto its side as we pulled free. The new team got to work, popped us level and we were in the game. 

In short time we hit the first control and then took a track across to the middle control of the Gauntlet - decision time again, back onto the roads or drive off the hill? You guessed it, down we went.

Our newly conscripted front seat navigator found himself totally outside his comfort zone, as he had been resting up the night before and was not involved in the map planning. At his request we switched him to the back and reinstated Ian, our camp manager, who had got us to the early morning start.

Once the Gauntlet was complete, we had time to stop and chat with Teresa Sapieha, the longstanding Captain of the Team 47 "The Girls in Pearls", an icon of the Rhino Charge who was there supporting Rhino Ark on her crutches, unable to compete but determined not to miss out. Proper old-school spirit and a true inspiration to just get on with it.

So - where to next? Back to HQ and visit our boys, show them Car 30 was on its way and wish them well and a swift recovery.

On arrival back at the Medical Centre we found the #30 ward occupants either asleep or delirious so after a friendly pat on their heads we left and hit the tracks and roads again. 

The course set up of the Rhino Charge evolves over time and has been through a recent period of tightening rules aimed to encourage cars off the roads with penalties for excessive use. This year the organisers had taken a different tack. Roads existed, some in red (up to 5km free use), others green (free to use) and lots of dry river beds and flat stretches full of cattle paths that, when found, frankly were as good as roads.

Chargers still need to aim straight but for our weakly team it allowed us to take part and, as the day wore on, our confidence grew and we began to take on a few tougher challenges.

The car had been beautifully prepared at Foley’s garage with an engine rebuild that had restored our 39 year old 1985 Range Rover Classic to its original power output. After an engine-warming riverbed run, we found the track that took us up to Satao Guard Post and enjoyed the revitalised roar of the V8 as it took the hill climb in its stride. With our newly cobbled-together team we weren’t capable of executing our earlier plan to drop off the mountain edge but we straightened our line into Slater & Whitaker and then Tireworld Guard Posts through the cattle paths on the valley floors. 

On arrival at Tireworld and a chat with spectators we made the ever-fatal Rhino Charge error of taking on advice. It started as a gentle enquiry.

The evening before we had planned to see if we might climb over a steep-edged saddle into Solex. It seemed crazy but possible in the darkness. In daylight with a restricted team it looked possible but seemed crazy.

The clincher was an overheard comment that an Unmodified Class car had just come down from there. Why oh why do we so easily forget? DOWN is very different from UP, especially on the Rhino Charge. 

The boys in the back had perked up a little. Perhaps they had got bored of their rear view. "Shall we give it a go?" There were the tracks heading into the bush …. tempting us …. the siren’s call to any Rhino Charge entrant. A nod from runner 1, a shrug from runner 2, a smile from runner 3. The front-cab occupants were itching for it and so off we set. 

The bush tracks vanished as we turned a corner and we found ourselves in a 6ft high meadow of yellow and white wildflowers that took one's breath away. We stopped for photos, no rush this year. 

As we carried on, our crew mechanic Omondi was now really into the RC groove and leading the hunt for a track up the hill. Above us we saw a car traversing downwards. It's exit pathway was quickly discovered and our new engine powered the car upwards, seemingly unstoppable until we reached the inevitable problem. A sheer face of rock. Droppable ? Yes ! Scalable ? Hmmm ….. 

But we had our twin-motor Gigglepin super-winch and it doesn’t get infected by bacteria. There was a tree ahead, on top of the hill. Sadly just too far for our winch cable to reach…There was a swarm of runners from Car 55 "Team CarZone", looking to drop off the cliff-face but we were in their path. Generously they offered their car as a winch point which was rapidly accepted.

Our car got up halfway and then stuck. The other vehicle started slipping so we needed to give up in case they were pulled over the cliff on top of us but the effort proved worthwhile as now we were in reach of the tree.

The winch amazed itself, the engine overheated due a slipped fan belt, would not start on a hillside because of a very hot electrical join and of course the scenery was amazing.  

Our crew mechanic Omondi was quickly underneath, pinched two overheated wires on the starter motor with his fingers and the engine roared back to life again. He’d worked it out with no fuss or bother and we were suddenly over the cliff face; we had actually done something of real Rhino Charge endeavour.

The boys in the back were shattered - the message came forward that they didn’t need another exploit, thank you very much. "OK guys, we hear you, let’s get back onto the tracks and riverbeds." 

Our mission now was to carry on, avoid red roads so as not to get a 10km road penalty that would cost us a checkpoint and get to the end of the day with our remaining teammates in reasonable shape. As it was, there weren’t beds enough for them as well in the clinic. 

We cruised riverbeds, cutting-cutting-cutting corners to save every last metre. From time to time tracks of other Charge Cars appeared out of the bush leading to & from the river bed and often going in our intended direction - yes, we took them…just too tempting and hoping that no further running would be needed. GuardPost after GuardPost ticked by.

Suddenly we were at the top of an unsighted drop-off, 50m from our starting GuardPost CopyCat. We were almost done!

“Cummon guys, one last effort, let’s see what we have to do now.” 

“It’s OK, you’ll be fine” came back the radio call from our tired forward-scouting party. 

One never knows as a front-seat occupant what to expect when you go over a blind lip on the Rhino Charge but this last descent proved to be extremely steep. Hearts in mouths after a day spent in the various sanitary facilities dotted around the mountains wasn’t ideal but in seconds it was done. Time check 15:46 - Charge Car 30 was back home! 

The CopyCat team were more than a little surprised to see us. 

“It’s only 4 o’clock! 

Aren’t you the sick crew? 

You’ve finished? 

Did you do the half-charge? 

No? The whole thing - really?”

Don (Clerk of the Course) had said Chargers could be home by 4pm if we took it sensibly and we proved him right. We had visited all the GuardPosts, done a serious piece of extreme Charging up a sheer cliff, kept off the red roads (zero penalties inflicted) and brought back our crew in pretty much one piece. 

Where to next? Back to the Medical Centre of course, to see our teammates and share the moment of triumph against adversity. When we got there they weren’t in a fit state at all. The bugs were hard at work on them and the tubes into their arms were full of antibiotics. Even I, the driver, succumbed briefly with the onset of headaches and was given a full check up by the senior doctor. Heart rate was racing (no surprise), sugar levels higher than usual (chocolate bars in the cab) but blood pressure stable. All just for a couple of aspirin but fair call from the medics, given our team’s previous.  

As the next morning broke over our camp, Car 30 teammates were somewhat thin on the ground at the early coffee session. 3 were already back in Nairobi, 2 still lay groaning on overnight drips in the field clinic. Those moving eventually mustered in the dawn-lit riverbed and reflected on finishing the 2024 Rhino Charge together. 

There would still be a couple more dramas ahead; getting the last two of our boys airlifted by AMREF to the Aga Khan where they were admitted for a further 4 days to fighting off the salmonella infection; dropping camp into fewer vehicles than it came out in, driving out ourselves without GuardPost privies at moments of stomach-churning need. Eventually though our vehicles and remaining crew all made it back into the big city of Nairobi.  

In the days following every morsel of food was looked at with suspicion. Hunger overcomes fear eventually but the outcomes can still be pretty immediate. Our final feeling? The Kenya Rhino Charge is amazing. A true test of mechanical preparation, application of bush knowledge and experience, a proper trial for cool heads in a crisis and in 2024 the greatest test for the Car 30 team to get through extreme circumstances in spite of what Nature throws at you. 

We visited all 13 GuardPosts and in the final results we came 13th out of 22 in the Modified Class, 27th out of 52 entrants in the whole event. We were also Highly Commended in the Spirit of the Charge awards.

To cap it all, an extraordinary cause has been supported once again. After 18 entries in 20 years, Car 30 has managed to raise over $200,000 to help Rhino Ark preserve Kenya’s water towers, mountains and forests and turn back the tide of human exploitation of our natural resources. 18 Charges chalked up, plenty more to come.